How is election time like dating? We think of love bombing as something to look out for on a first date. But are politicians learning to love bomb us? Or more likely, are we increasingly choosing those leaders who love bomb? If so, does it matter? I’m going to start with why it matters on a first date.
Great piece on lovebombing and breakdown of lovebombing red flags. Too many people still can't spot the red flags because they're enjoying being idealised. There are many parallels between how narcissistic political leaders and narcissistic dates groom their followers/dates. I've seen some leaders put on an accent to match that of their audience, then proceed to describe how amazing their city/county/state is citing facts that are sources of pride for the group.
Lovebombing is powerful because of the positive impression the target already has about the narcissistic leader. The work this charismatic leader and others do to bolster their reputation and create an intriguing fantasy is what makes lovebombing a strategy that successfully facilitates an emotional bond between the narcissist and their supply.
Thanks Nathalie for adding so much with a single comment. Yes the first rule of red flag spotting is to ask the right questions. The second rule is to notice when you dont want to - because it feels too good to spoil.
Yes. The seduction works well when the love bomber has a desperate need to be idealised. And it works well when the victim has a need for someone whose promises a fantasy. When both love bomber and victim have these needs, it's an instant match, (or a guaranteed vote) and inevitable disappointment.
Great piece on lovebombing and breakdown of lovebombing red flags. Too many people still can't spot the red flags because they're enjoying being idealised. There are many parallels between how narcissistic political leaders and narcissistic dates groom their followers/dates. I've seen some leaders put on an accent to match that of their audience, then proceed to describe how amazing their city/county/state is citing facts that are sources of pride for the group.
Lovebombing is powerful because of the positive impression the target already has about the narcissistic leader. The work this charismatic leader and others do to bolster their reputation and create an intriguing fantasy is what makes lovebombing a strategy that successfully facilitates an emotional bond between the narcissist and their supply.
Thanks Nathalie for adding so much with a single comment. Yes the first rule of red flag spotting is to ask the right questions. The second rule is to notice when you dont want to - because it feels too good to spoil.
Wow - startled & flattered by the name-check! Many thanks indeed.
The problem with love bombing is that it works so well...
Yes. The seduction works well when the love bomber has a desperate need to be idealised. And it works well when the victim has a need for someone whose promises a fantasy. When both love bomber and victim have these needs, it's an instant match, (or a guaranteed vote) and inevitable disappointment.
The passage from Lowen reminds me of George Costanza's line, "It's not a lie if you believe it."